Creating Your Own Happiness

*At 25, I will have graduated college and landed my dream job teaching children. I will be a few years into my career and living in my dream house somewhere. I will have found my soulmate and be us against the world. By 27, I will be planning a wedding and soon be starting a family. I will have made it and be undeniably happy..*

Annnnddddd back to reality...

Above was my expectation and my timeline for my life when I pictured it growing up. I thought I would have all my shit together, ducks in a row, or whatever you want to call it; Finding "the one" and getting married was my definition of success and what I thought would ultimately make me happy. Now, I'm not saying I haven't accomplished a lot of those things, but boy was my vision of happiness wrong. 

I am also not saying that getting married and starting a family isn't a big priority or shouldn't be near the top of your list, but I never really thought about my own success. Things that I would do for myself, by myself. Things that would create my OWN happiness. 

After dating some guys here and there and then two toxic relationships that I knew I had to get out of, I quickly learned that I shouldn't be looking for a man to make me happy, but I should be looking toward God. I knew he had a plan for me, but getting married wasn't HIS top priority for me. I had to do some soul searching and find joy within myself before I could ever be with someone else. I needed to be the best woman I could and love myself unconditionally, before I could love someone else. So that's exactly what I did...I threw my hands up and let Him lead the way. 

After many trials and triumphs, I have really gotten to know myself. What I like, what I don't like, what my morals and values are, what I am passionate about, what I am attracted to, the respect I deserve, how to stand up for myself, how and when to say "no", how I love, what my personal style is, how to forgive, how to pick myself back up again, my hobbies, and things that set my soul on fire. The list goes on, but you get the point ;)

In my 25 years of life, I have discovered putting pressure on yourself and setting a timeline for you life, ultimately sets you up for failure. It's not about who you marry, the degree you have, or what you accomplish. It's about who you become as a person and if you are genuinely happy with her or not. A man, money, a job, a nice car, or a nice house won't bring you all the happiness in the world. It's about you being happy with yourself. Even though my life has not gone as my timeline had suggested, I am beyond thankful for the woman I have become. 

So sit back, enjoy the ride, and let yourself live. FOR YOU! It will all work out in God's timing ;)